Necessity is the Mother of Creativity!

This picture is from this morning. After getting in trouble last night and having TV taken away today, somehow Joy found something else to do!

I don't know if you can see it in the picture, but she made a nest in the corner and took some toys and a few books over there. She was reading the Dr. Seuss book aloud to the "baby" who was "sleepy". After she read the book, she got my calculator and played with that for nearly 15 minutes!

She announced this morning, "no tv today, Mama". I don't think it was a question - I really thought it was a statement. So we have cd's playing and it's actually been a great morning! I thought I was surely screwed by not having the tv to fall back on, but so far, we're okay!

It might help that we slept till almost 8:30 this morning. Yesterday, she was up at 4:30am and really didn't go back to sleep, although we didn't get out of bed till 7:00. She isn't really taking naps, except in the car (lol!) so if we don't get enough sleep, we are really cranky all day long, I found out yesterday.

I'm grateful for a nice day today!
Now, if she will just participate in Karate today rather than sucking on her hand sitting against the wall....

Happy Forever Family Day!

A little more than 40 years ago (I'm not going to be precise), I celebrated my first Happy Forever Family Day. I celebrated that extra "birthday" every year for a few years.

You see, January 29th was the day I came home to my Forever Family!

I was only 10 weeks old, so I don't remember the day, but I do remember that every year, I was told how I came home. I had a rash on my face and they didn't want to let me out of the orphanage. But Mom and Dad promised to take me to the pediatrician right away, on the way home. They did, and the doctor told them that if they didn't look at it, it would go away.

And of course, it went away!

There is a lot written in adoptive parents blogs about how perfectly their adopted children fit into their families - as if they were handpicked just for them. I have to agree, on both ends of the event!

I grew up in a family where I learned about logic and about fishing and camping too. I got to take piano lessons beginning when I was 5 and voice lessons when I turned 15. I got to go to great schools where I could study music, or anything I wanted. I learned to love artichokes with lemon butter (which was my mother's special treat when Daddy was playing golf late on Saturdays)and steaks on the grill (which Daddy cooked outside on Friday nights). I learned how to play bridge so I could be the fourth with my parents and grandmother.

When I was growing up, I did go through a (predictable) period of resenting the whole thing. In third grade, my friends found out that I was adopted. I had always known, so I didn't think much about it. But when the teasing started and the "shunning" in the lunch room didn't stop, my parents decided to take me out of school for a little while. I got to go to Europe with my mother and grandmother and a group of my grandmother's friends. I was, obviously, the youngest there, and I had a grand time! By the time I got home, I was no longer writing "I hate you" in my diary!

I didn't know that much about my birth parents and had created a "birth myth" to beat them all! My birthparents were famous musicians and if I practiced hard enough, maybe I'd be good enough to perform with them! Now I realize how silly that was, but also how that made me practice and stay with music when I might not have otherwise.

I also see, now that I'm older just how perfect my parents were for me. I can see how some things in me are nature (my singing ability for instance, since my mother was asked not to sing at the sorority functions even though she knew all the words!). I can also see how some qualities are based on nurture (by ability to think my way through a problem or issue - thanks Mother!). I also learned that I was tougher than I thought, and I can still bait my own hook, which is not a bad thing to know!

I can also see, from my perspective with Joy, how perfectly she fits into our family! I know that her musical talent is innate, but I know that I can help her nurture it. I know that her temper and "whiney-ness" might be innate, but are most likely something that has worked for her in the past - and being aware of that helps me "nurture" that out of her. I see how adventurous she is and I know how good that will be for me and Tim. I see how resilient she is and know that we will help protect that in her so that she will always be able to rely on herself and those who love her.

I see how Zach and Courtney play with Joy and know that she is exactly the little sister they needed. I see how she adores them and can't wait for Ge-ge to get home from school or our Skype with Jei-jei and know that they are the perfect siblings for her.

I also know she's the perfect granddaughter for my mother - Joy will love being spoiled and I bet my mother can keep up with her! (I hope I can keep up with them both!)

So Happy Forever Family Day! And thank you, Mother! Love you more than I can say!

Heartfelt Thanks & Tidbits

Thank You!
Tim and I just wanted to thank everyone who has called, emailed or sent gifts to Joy! Your generosity has been overwhelming!! We can't thank you enough!

I know that brides usually have 8 weeks after the honeymoon is over to get thank you notes out, but how long to new adoptive parents have?

I also wanted to let you know that if you sent something to us from Amazon.com, there were a few things that didn't have any information about who sent them. Please let me know so that we can thank you!

Tidbits

Singing in the Car
I think we know what the attraction of going in Mama's car is - singing to the cd's in the car! Not only does she know which cd is which number (there are 6 in the player), she knows which song is on which track! So she will say, "Mama, play 6 number 2 please!" That means, CD #6 and track 2. Amazing! I didn't even realize she could see the display that far away.

The other amazing thing is that she already knows a lot of the songs. We bought a cd of children singing gospel songs and children's songs. She obviously knows "This Little Light of Mine", "Jesus Loves Me", and a few others.

Yesterday, she asked for the "Jesus Loves Me" track, then sang along at the top of her lungs, having the best time! Then she says, "Mama, Taiwan Mama (meaning her foster mother), love Jesus. Joy baby love Jesus" and she showed me how she put her hands together to pray. I am flabbergasted (and grateful) and say, "yes, and Jesus loves Joy too". She smiled this huge smile and said, "yes!"

Last night, she sang "This Little Light of Mine" as she's getting ready for bed. She tells me, "Mama, Joy light shine, yes?" Yes, sweetheart, it certainly does!

Chinese or English
The other day in the car, Joy is singing the counting song (1, 2, I love you, etc). She has already sung it about 4 times, when it starts to come out not quite right. She is clearly frustrated and goes silent. Suddenly, out pops Yi, Er, San, Si, Wu which is 1-5 in Chinese. I'm thinking, I'm glad she still has that in her head. But wait, she isn't finished ---

"Mama, you try!"

Okay, I have Yi, Er, San down, but once we get past 3, I'm not so sure. She's counting to 15 faster than I can remember things. She usually enjoys being able to laugh at my Chinese, but she's frustrated that I'm not doing it as well as she wants me to. So, I have her start over and go slower. We get to 10, finally.

I think she may end up being bi-lingual. But in the process, I may have to learn some Mandarin! Oh my goodness!!

Food Part 2, or Ramen Noodles for Breakfast
Well, she seems to be eating enough food. And thank goodness, she's decided that Chicken McNuggets really aren't all that great (especially compared to KFC's fried chicken legs). But heaven forbid you order thick french fries! "Little French Fries, Mama!" comes the plaintive wail from the backseat!

The most interesting thing, I think, is how adventurous she was in Taipei. Anything we asked her to taste, she did. She didn't like everything, but some things were then asked for the next time we went to the buffet.

But now, getting her to taste anything is very difficult. And what tasted good yesterday, doesn't necessarily taste good today. Getting her to expand her food choices is going to be hard, at least right now. I know that adopted children frequently "control" their food because it is something they now can control. She doesn't hoard though. And she is getting better about my asking her to wait a minute before I can fulfill a request for food. But I'm getting awfully tired of chicken!

However, I have to admit that Ramen Noodles for breakfast is really pretty good! In fact, I like it a lot! We put bok choy, napa cabbage, green onions, a brussel sprout or two, and snow peas in it. Since she only eats about half of it, I have been eating the rest for breakfast. It's really good! You should try it!!

Why We Scream
I'm so glad our neighbors are used to the dogs being loud! Joy can certainly scream loudly! I mean, really loudly! She loves to expand her lung capacity outside, which is fine. But her favorite time is Bed Time.

We'll get teeth brushed and instead of just getting into pajamas, Joy has to run around, screaming. I finally asked her why does she scream.

She said, "Joy happy!"

Well, I'm glad you're happy, but sometimes it sounds like you're in pain or you're a year old and crying. But, I don't doubt that you're happy!

I asked her, did you scream in Taiwan?

Yes, she answers, with one of those grins on her face.

"Did you get in trouble in Taiwan when you screamed?"

She bursts out laughing. She bobs her head - Yes!!

Aha! Just as I thought!

So Mama is being stricter about Inside and Outside voices. She's gotten much better about yelling in my ear or the dogs' ears. She also knows she isn't supposed to yell in the bathroom, although it is a lot of fun!

As long as I provide her time at the playground to yell and scream, she seems to get it (mostly) out of her system.

Dancing
Well, now I know why we have to watch the Lazy Town show that has the ballerina in it a thousand times. She has memorized the dance routines! Almost, anyway.

So now, she wants to watch each episode 3 or 4 times in a row and then dances with the characters on the last one.

Right now, she's repeating all the dialog and asking me if she's right when she's not sure.

No wonder she is speaking pretty well already!

I'm just not sure the couch will survive being used as a saw horse....


The Swing
Joy definitely has a love of going faster and higher on the swings. We have been taking her to a park that has one of the bigger swings that locks the child inside it. She is just a little too light to stay in the leather swing seat.

She starts singing and screaming all at the same time, as soon as I get it started. Then she reminds me that Daddy says "Push" each time. So I have to do that, as loudly as I can!

She then sings and babbles in various languages, just as happy as she could be! As soon as we get high enough (about parallel with the bar), she screams, at the top of her lungs, "Mama, we did it!"

I have to laugh every time!

And she would stay there until her hands were frozen to the metal chain. (Sometimes the gloves stay on, sometimes they don't.) When I say, okay, 5 more pushes, she usually is good about agreeing, but as the swing starts to slow on its own, she starts to whine. I have to remind her to enjoy the end part too. And think about what she wants to do next.

Before it's totally stopped, she's ready to jump out of it and run to the slide.

It's actually a good thing we don't have a swing set in the back yard - it has become a reward for running errands with me and behaving. Or something special she and Daddy get to do.

It certainly thrills her. As did pointing out the pedals on the floor of the car in the front driver's side. Yes, the gas and brake pedals! Already! She told me those make the car go and stop, right? That's a truly scary thought!

Video Posting

Let's try this again - this is the video of Joy singing along with the band.
She really can sing it - but she knew she was being taped and the jumping up and down and screaming it was more fun!

The piece of paper in her hands is a guitar. She asked me to draw an outline of one, then she colored it and we cut it out. That's the second one. The first one was too small, she said....

I don't know if she's going to play the piano, play the violin, or be in a rock band! Or maybe an aerobics instructor? :)